Prank Calls

As I'm sitting on the couch relaxing after a long day my phone starts ringing. I'm a slightly paranoid person..so I don't answer for numbers I don't know. If it's important they'll leave a message or call back, right? So, I don't answer. And the second the phone stops ringing it starts again. Someone is urgently calling me. So I answer the phone only to hear heavy breathing. Yeah, I'm paranoid, but I know a prank call when I hear one. So I hang up. The number calls me four more times in a row. (We're up to six calls at this point) Finally, I answer again and hear, in a super creepy super high pitched voice, "I am who you're talking to now."...over and over. I hang up. They call back. We repeat. Seven calls. These same people proceed to call me six more times. That's right people 11 calls from this prank caller.

Now, some important background information. I've pissed off a few people in my life. A few of those few are people you really don't want to piss off. So, naturally, as I'm recieving these calls I'm thinking that it must be these same people.

Anyways, prank calling is not nice. It freaks people like me out. And people like me don't deal well with being threatened. But what can I possibly do to get even with these horrible people that won't stop blowing up my phone?! I'm glad you ask...

I send their number to a friend who calls to find out who they are. We deduct I do not know this person and they're pointlessly, and quite rudely, prank calling people. So, I decide it's a perfect time for the "Golden Rule": Treat others how you'd like to be treated.

I send their number to select people. Who then send the number to all of their friends. Averaging about 50 people. These people all prank call the prank caller. Some of the things they said were hysterical. They called and called and called until the phone was turned off. Then, they texted. And texted. And texted.

Moral of the Story: Do not prank call me. Because I have friends who will make you regret your decision.

Below are some of the things my friends said to the prank callers:

1) A dialoge between the original prankster and my friend pranking.

Original: Hello

Friend: Hello

Original: ...

Friend: ...May I help you?

Original: Excuse me?

Friend: I'm sorry, can I help you with something?

Original: What?!

Friend: Who is this?

Original: Who is this?!

Friend: You called me! Who is this?!

Original: No, you called me!

Friend: I demand to know who this is, or I'm haning up!

Original: What?!

Friend ends call.

Genius!

2) Friend pretends to be from the phone company.

Friend: Hello, my name is Ron Stevens I'm with the phone company. We've had some complaints tonight about the phone service and we'd like to have you test out some phrases for us if you wouldn't mind.

Original: Alright

Friend: Please repeat the following - "I'm a silly monkey"

Original: What? I'm not saying that!

Friend: Ma'am, please.

Original: I'm a silly monkey.

Friend: Now say "Prank calling isn't nice"

hahahaha, I love these people.

3) Radio show Prank

Friend: Hello sir I'm Gerald from 95.1 the big Ape and do we have a prize for you! You're our lucky winner. By answering these select questions for everyone on air you will win a three day spa vacation! What do you say? 3 day Vacay?

Original: Alright, good!

Friend: Question one - How often do you listen to our station?

Original: Answers.

Friend: Question two - is it often enough for you to know there's no Gerald on 95.1?

Original: I'm sorry?

Friend: Question three - Do you know prank calling isn't nice?

I love these people.

Never prank call me.

You'll be sorry.